A Puddleglum Thanksgiving

I want to think I am a thankful person.  I’ve read that Voskamp book, and I’ve gotten to #81 of my 1000 gifts recorded.  (Started in July.) Okay, so I’m not doing so well.

There are some genes hidden somewhere I’m sure that boast thankful DNA.  But to be honest, I have a melancholy streak in me that sees the dark side first.  It’s not that I am a glass-half-empty kind of gal; I think I missed out on even getting the glass!

People that sport wide toothy grins all the time are irritating–irritating on several levels.  First, no one can be that happy all the time with all the war, pollution, bed bug infestations, dog droppings in public areas, and alien snatchings abounding; and second, how in the world could they afford all those beautiful veneers anyway.  Dentistry to me has always meant pain and money.  “Cosmetic” isn’t even on my dentally challenged radar.  So if you see a photo of me with a lovely genuine smile, most likely it will have been photoshopped, just as soon as I can afford that luxury item on my computer–me, one of the 98%!  Sigh.

When I was young, my dad used to tell me to get rid of that big lip or he’d knock it off for me.  No wait, that was the chip on my shoulder.  I think the lip line was something about a cat going to come sit on it (which wouldn’t have been so bad, I’m thinking).

How could I explain that pouting for me was a contact sport–contact meaning communication.  Without a serious pout, how was my family to know how incredibly tough life was being on this third of seven on a lovely farm in Ontario, far from the ravages of genocidal warfare, drought, bread lines, and multi-level marketing schemes.  No one took my aggravations seriously, so I took to writing poetry and moody songs.  Finally, I had an audience.  And after all, isn’t that the most important thing in life!

So here are a few of the things I am thankful for.  And be generous because I am trying really really hard!

  • I am thankful for coffee.  Without it, my energy would flag by 9 a.m., and I would be more unproductive than my husband already thinks I am.  The fact that it contributes to my acid reflux and costs 5 bucks a pop only serves to remind me of the incredible sacrifices of which I am capable.  (Notice how I expertly was able not to end with a preposition? :-))
  • I am thankful for my children, who though they move thousands of miles from me so as to increase my overwhelming feelings of loneliness and abandonment, still find it in their hearts (at least some of them) to have grandchildren so I will always have a new crop to laugh at my jokes.
  • I am especially thankful for my youngest child who, though I secretly always loved him best, has broken my fragile heart by announcing to his dad and me that he is actually going to move out and start a life of his own.  I thought those apron strings were securely tied, and now he has the audacity to brutally and unceremoniously cut them with one callous move toward adulthood!
  • I am thankful for the United States of America that warmly awarded me with an alien registration card.  I had to marry a Yank to get it, but that has worked out pretty well after all.
  • I am thankful for Costco pumpkin pie because since I paid so much money for it, I feel obligated to eat it.  And what would pre-pre-Thanksgiving Day be without pie?  Then I can go to the family celebration and pretend that I am sticking to my diet; though, a Curves check-in next week may be a problem.
  • Oh, and I’m thankful for Curves where I can pay good hard-earned money to pant and suffer and complain about not losing.  The pie and chocolate have nothing to do with it! I’m just big-boned.
  • I kind of referenced this before, but I am thankful for my hubby, who not only made me legal, but has stood beside me through fat (I mean, thick) and thin for 39 years.  His only fault (at least that I have time to mention) is that he is a poor conversationalist.  As I lay in bed, all the ideas of the day percolate to my head and come out my mouth.  I get some of my best ideas then.  It is irritating that he thinks lying down might mean going to sleep.

I am thankful–I mean really–for many other things, but I better close now. This is exhausting.  I don’t remember the last time I was so thankful all in one microburst.  Whew!

About apronheadlilly

wife and mother, musician, composer / poet, teacher, and observer of the world, flawed Christ-follower
This entry was posted in Family, Humor, Photography, Uncategorized, Writing and tagged , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

23 Responses to A Puddleglum Thanksgiving

  1. susansplace says:

    Happy Thanksgiving, Lilly! I just ate four Ghirardelli chocolate/caramel candies so that my stomach can start getting prepared for the pie tomorrow. Good planning, I think. Take care!

  2. Cheryl says:

    Ditto to the ‘thankful for coffee’! Great post. I have one son in the same province and another 3 provinces away. Great guys who I don’t get to see enough no matter how often they visit.

  3. Sreeja says:

    beautiful post Lilly! 🙂

  4. dorannrule says:

    You are definitely a very thankful person Lilly. I like the one about Curves…. ditto. But don’t you feel noble if you make it there once or twice a week? I am thankful I went twice this week! Also noble, energized and self deluded re major body image alterations. Happy Thanksgiving! Luv, Dor

    • I still hope to lose weight (again!!), but I keep going regardless because my hips and back are so much better if I keep them fit. I am still in denial about not being 20 anymore.

      Happy Thanksgiving!

  5. tootlepedal says:

    I’m thankful to have made your digital acquaintance. Happy Thanksgiving.

  6. reinkat says:

    I am thankful that you keep writing your blog and taking those marvelous pictures. You bring a smile to me every day. Happy Thanksgiving Night!

  7. Mona says:

    Oh this is just delightful, Lilly. I have been away for a while (haven’t even read emails) and am thankful that I stopped to look at this post. Your essay is wonderfully written–I feel as if I’m sitting at the kitchen table sharing a cup of coffee with you while you share you thoughts. (And yes, I too, and thankful for, and addicted to, coffee.)

    You have a great sense of humor! (Oh, I like the pics too.)

  8. Reblogged this on A p r o n h e a d — Lilly and commented:

    **********A recycle from last year. This year I’m sick so can’t be as creative or coherent.

  9. Atall CeeL says:

    Happy thanksgiving day !
    and dont forget to visit my blog :
    http://parkchanyoungimnida.wordpress.com/
    http://atalsaja.blogspot.com/
    Thanks ! 😀

  10. My grandma used to say a rooster was going to come sit on my lip if it got any lower!

  11. nutsfortreasure says:

    I am thankful to have you in my life and by the way ALL MEN DO THAT! 🙂

    Here is some help I heard the 3 cups I brew each morning between 4 AM and 6 AM are worthless but the 9 or 10 AM jolt is all we really need I would hate to have seen me lay down 3 million miles in a big rig without my coffee.

    I will have to be very meager with my WW points all weekend so I do not gain all I have lost come weigh-in Tuesdays I HATE TUESDAYS lol

    To end my reply I will say this you and I could have been the pout sisters 🙂

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