My Book of Uncommon Prayers: Lord of the Me

A p r o n h e a d -- Lilly

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It is hard when well-worked out beliefs run smack dab into life:  this war zone of a broken world where wills collide and battle lines are drawn,

human, angelic, and Godhead.

And I am in the crosshairs, but not afraid—

at least not too much,

too often—because

my leader is ultimate Lord of all—Lord of this real and reeling universe.

And I believe for others, and

I believe for myself, and

I hang on in trouble


the trouble is bigger that I can carry, and the trouble brims to the top of one so weak,

and then,

my belief runs smack dab into my “Lord, I believe; help Thou my unbelief,” and

my perseverance smacks up against my “though you slay me, yet will I praise,” and

there seems to be no life in the clinging words, only desperation.

How can I believe I am not alone, yet feel…

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About apronheadlilly

wife and mother, musician, composer / poet, teacher, and observer of the world, flawed Christ-follower
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2 Responses to My Book of Uncommon Prayers: Lord of the Me

  1. Patty says:

    Just thinking about your sensitive spirit that is revealed through your writings. When life becomes overwhelming, I think of that Casting Crowns song, “I will praise you in the storm.” Music as you well know, can speak to our hearts more than words. It seems to have a way of tearing through those cobwebs, and hidden, untouched parts of our broken soul. It also reminds us that our faith in God is what we must rely on to relieve our stress in this broken world. It doesn’t make those moments any easier, but neither does worry. Hard work and anxiety suffer from the law of diminishing returns. 🙂
    I hope your day is going well.

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